-Once again I had too much fun in my philosophy of education class. This time it wasn't my teacher that was making me laugh but my classmates. My teacher always brings in a basket of chocolates for the class, and this kid behind me raises his hand and just goes "How old is this hershey kiss?" We all turn to look at him. "Is this supposed to be white chocolate?" he asks. My teachers says no, and realizes it's probably from last easter. We were all grossed out. But later Missy told me in the car that the piece of candy was actually fine. Missy knows everything. Then Sarcastic Steve...I told him at the end of class I can't sit near him anymore because he makes me laugh too much. I kept trying to raise my hand to say something and the teacher never noticed me...and the class only has 6 people in it so I'm not that hard to notice. Anyway. Steve (who is a drafting teacher) writes me a note "Tim (my teacher) hates Rachel" and he has arrows pointing at us. Then a few minutes later he writes "Tim be hating Rachel." haha. I did finally get to say what I wanted to say. Also steve told a horrifying story about when his brother was younger and went to catholic school for a year and his teacher the nun told him that if he didn't do well in school the scarf man was going to come out of his closet and strangle him to death! How horrible! But when he told the story I pictured scarf man as being a gay man who stepped out of your closet to give you a scarf. Now that wouldn't be so bad
On Friday Me, Missy,Jamie, Mo, Jesse and Joelle went bowling
The guy who gave us our bowling shoes was very fun. When I said I wanted size 5 and a half. He kept saying. “five and a haaaaaaaaalf”. It was like “goaaaaaaal”
Here's a quick profile of who played. I think we are the coolest bowlers in the world because we always have the best names....though could anything really top big fat aorta? Yeah, I don't think so. Anyway the players were
Da Ali B (Aka Jamie). He will lay the Da Ali B smack down on anyone who gets in his way. His special skills include having Da in his name, he can write in roman numerals, can slide on the floor as he bowls like nobody's business. He often talks to his bowling ball named chico to get advice.
Professor Klaw (AKA Jesse). Professor Klaw, Klaws out the competition with his cat like reflexes. He is a man of mystery, and prefers to keep his face hidden from the public in photos. He is also known as Mr. Professor Klaw man. He teaches the theory and principles of modern cat-ology at the University of Kitten. And he likes long walks on the beach, and reading in his swimming trunks.
The Dewey Decimator (AKA Joelle) Not a sound can be heard when she bowls. she quiets the crowd with her dazzling bowling/librarian skills. Her trademark move is her polite hand gesture which cane be seen when she tosses the ball down the lane. Born to Amish parents, The Dewey Decimator has broken free of her childhood lifestyle and has become a respected bowler, winning her legions of fans and breaking the hearts of amish parents everywhere.
Zeke Zuckerman (AKA....ME). Zeke, although a girl, takes on the role of a young man when she bowls. She is strange and random and the only person in the league to change genders while they play.Besides the gender bending issue She...I mean He has caused a lot of controversy about the way he bowls, bowling the ball so slowly during turns, that the ball sometimes does not even register, giving her...I mean him...free turns. The ball can be scene straggling down the lane at a total of 0.5 mph. Is Zeke just weak? Is Zeke purposely cheating? Nobody knows for sure.
Margot Oh (AKA Mo) Margot Oh is a crowd pleaser at tournaments. Her name can be heard on the lips of the crowd, as they chant her name over and over again. She is psychic, and knows what she will score beforehand, so she must make sure she bowls up to her psychic score. It may seem like she is purposely throwing balls into the gutter, but she is simply fulfilling her psychic destiny. She likes even numbers, rolling down grassy hills in a hula skirt. Her favorite band is Hall and Oates. Especially the Christmas songs.
Pain Austen (Aka missy) Don't let the peace sign fool you. Peace is the last thing of Pain Austen's mind. Pain and Agony is what she concentrates on, focusing on causing her opponents as much anguish as possible. She moonlights as a pirate on the weekends, performing at birthday parties and old folks home, and is home employed by the band air supply. She enjoys loud heavy metal music, eating raw meat, and playing classical xylophone music, which can be heard in elevators all around the USA.
Professor Klaw had to change into his “professor” jacket. It makes him feel smarter!
Made up caption
Pain Austen-I am soooo drunk
Da Ali B-Yummmmm......cheese.....
Professor Klaw-If this isn’t the face of a happy person I don’t know what is
The Dewey Decimator- Oh yay! Michael Bolton is here!!!! Let the party begin!!!
Pain Austen, The Dewey Decimator, and Margot Oh scared away the people that were playing next to us.
This is how I scare away people. Yes this is much scarier
The Dewey Decimator saw this little girl and said “ That purple girl reminds me of Missy.” What I heard was “That cripple girl reminds me of Missy”
See? Pain Austen is a cripple after all....or perhaps she’s Professor Klaw’s wife.
After bowling we went to starbucks where drunk stories were told. Since I have no drunk stories I will make one up right now for your reading pleasure. “So I was at a bar with my “brother” mario Lopez, and it was my birthday and we played a game where every time someone mentioned saved by the bell, I had to take a shot of something. Well this happened a lot, and I got very drunk after 509658523552365423021255220 drinks. I didn’t get sick. Instead I just kept on singing a polish song out loud every 5 minutes, and kept asking when william Shatner was coming. William never showed, but some guy manny did show up who I thought was William shatner and I had a lot of fun with him. We made balloon animals and juggled fire sticks. All of this I was told by mario the next morning as I couldn’t remember a thing” The end!
I’m ending today’s entry with another “Do you hear what I hear” segment.
Mom-Play Oh Holy Night
Me-(To myself....knowing what she meant but I swear I heard....) Play Oh Hobo Night.
Oh Hobo night....................I’m going to write lyrics to that someday!
Random Photo of the day
Viking Tuxedo....do I really want a tuxedo from a viking? Actually, yeah I probably would knowing me! As you can see next door is viking dry cleaners...so you can get your viking tuxedo cleaned at the viking dry cleaners. Viking....Viking....Viking.
Seth quote/scene of the day
(Seth's nana (His dad's mom is coming to visit)
Seth-I love when the nana comes and suddenly dad is all Jewish again!